Wrestling Wramblings: Monday Night Raw 19/05/14 LIVE!

Everyone has a guilty pleasure. I have many, but one of them is the hurricane of stupidity that is professional wrestling. In my ongoing attempt to broaden my pool of writing topics and styles, I present a bulletpoint, match-by-match recap of last night's WWE TV offering Monday Night Raw, which I was fortunate enough to attend live in the O2 Arena London.

This is written assuming you know a bit about wrestling - I don't explain who people are, the stories or the lingo. It's really just a chance for me to get some thoughts out. Also yes I know it's all fake and no I don't care.

• The O2 was packed and I'm pretty sure the show was a legit sellout. Crowd was very hot. Plenty of 'CM PUNK' and 'YES!' chants. Lots of 'wooooo's. Huge 'WE WANT BARRETT' chants too.
• We were up in the nosebleed seats but still closer than I expected, and we actually had a pretty great view all told.

Superstars Taping: Big Show def. Titus O'Neil, Jack Swagger (w/Zeb Colter) def. Cody Rhodes (w/Goldust)

• Hey, these aren't Superstars matches, they've got actual legit guys on them!
• Seriously though, these were very decent matches with a much higher level of talent than I expected. Great way to kick off the evening.
• Big pop for Big Show when he came out, and even from up high you could tell how massive he was. Solid match with Titus, with the crowd hushing for three big chest slaps and really getting into the attempted chokeslam. Titus got a little heel heat but went down pretty easily.
• Cody vs Swagger was a good match too, with Cody in control most of the time and hitting most of his signature spots like his Disaster Kick and his Sunset Flip from the turnbuckle.
• Cody also did some bigger spots which I was surprised he'd bust out on a nothing taping. Most notably his top rope dive to the outside and his top turnbuckle moonsault.
• People sung along to Swagger's music and chanted 'WE THE PEOPLE' with gusto.

Raw begins with Bray Wyatt cutting a promo on John Cena. Cena then jumped out from under the ring to attack the Wyatt Family.

• Bray Wyatt must surely be one of the best promo guys ever. Listening to him talk was spellbinding.
• Less spellbinding - the crowd giving him the 'WHAT?' chant.
• I was completely taken in by the old 'entrance music plays' trick and I didn't actually notice Cena until he was halfway through his Attitude Adjustment on Bray.

Cesaro (w/Paul Heyman) defeated Sheamus in a non-title match

• Thrilled that Paul Heyman made it out to Europe.  'E-C-DUB' chants while he was walking to the ring. His inspired promo was so much fun.
• The crowd reaction was mostly similar to my own, which was enthusiastic boos between fits of laughter. Everyone chanted along with his 'My client BROOOOOCK LESNAR' spiel.
• On the other hand, Sheamus was roundly booed. Not sure if it was the result of a very 'smart' crowd or simply the Irish thing, but he wasn't a popular man (though the reaction was still huge).
• Decent match, if a little slow. There was a weird series of spots where Cesaro tossed Sheamus through the ropes like four times in a row, which eventually became a comedy spot. Cesaro also kept shaking Paul Heyman's hand, which again got pretty funny.
• Cesaro deadlift superplexing Sheamus from the outside was incredibly impressive.
• The interference ending seems a little unnecessary, but seeing Heyman throw his jacket into the ring was fun.
• Predictable though, because now Sheamus has a title he has to lose every match he's in.

Big E def. Ryback in a Beat the Clock Challenge

• Big E still got a decent pop, so that push isn't entirely dead yet.
• I love that matching beanies are now a thing for Rybaxel.
• I used this match as my toilet break which probably says something. It was OK, it just...was.

R-Truth and The Funkadactyls vs Fandango and Layla went to a no-contest when Summer Rae attacked Layla

• People are still REALLY into R-Truth for reasons I cannot fathom.
• London is still into fandangoing for slightly more acceptable reasons.
• Summer Rae showing up was a great moment, although I'm disappointed that this has once again been reduced to 'women fight over a man'. Why did't she just beat the crap out of Fandango too?

Stephanie McMahon comes out to announce she's asking Daniel Bryan to hand back the WWE World Heavyweight Championship

• Stephanie coming out to Daniel Bryan's music was an all time great troll move
• I think most of us who were 'in the know' knew that Bryan couldn't possibly be in the arena, but there was still a colossal pop for the music. 
• I can't help but feel bummed that (since he's apparently back next week) we attended the one episode of Raw in forever where Bryan wasn't around.
• Big cheers for the Barrett video package.
• The promo was masterful - seemingly reasonable but dripping with evil glee. Huge boos for all the potential new champions except for Barrett, who predictably got massive cheers (which Stephanie then used to heel on the crowd further).
• During the actual announcement that Stephanie wanted the title handed back, there was a COLOSSAL CM Punk chant going that drowned her out completely. Understandably WWE turned the crowd down for the broadcast, but you can still read lips and hear it faintly.

Rusev def. Heath Slater

• I'd completely forgotten that 3MB were 'The Union Jacks' last time they were here, but everyone absolutely loved it again and they got big cheers, which they played up really well.
• Crowd was kind of flat when Lana came out but her comically ludicrous heeling got her some heat, what with photoshopped Russian flags on the Houses of Parliament and such.
• As for the match...squash. At least Rusev finally beat up someone who wasn't black.

Rob van Dam def. Alberto del Rio in a Beat the Clock Challenge

• RVD is still really over with live crowds. More 'E-C-DUB' chants here
• However, the match itself was B-O-T-C-H-A-M-A-N-I-A. Even from our seats we could see daylight when del Rio 'kicked' RVD in the head. RVD went for Rolling Thunder twice and got it neither time - the first time he just legdropped him while the second he did a standing somersault. 
• That missed Five Star Frog Splash looked painful.

Seth Rollins def. Batista by disqualification after Triple H interfered.

   

•  Dear god, the Shield are really, really over.
• Triple H's little game at the beginning was a good laugh and at least meant we got to boo each of the Evolution members individually.
• Match was great, mostly because if there's one guy that can carry Batista it's Seth Rollins. Lots of insane bumps and a relatively high workrate.
• Good as the match was, the post match melee was even better. Big reaction to Orton chairshotting Reigns, Ambrose diving off the table, Triple H being sent over the table and Reigns' spear. The 'This is Awesome' chant got going pretty fast.
• Everyone shouted Reigns' OOOOOOOOOH along with him.

Alicia Fox defeated Paige in a non-title match

• Crowd was naturally really into Paige, but Fox as well got a decent cheer.
• When Fox won the crowd was sort of stunned into silence, but they quickly got back into the post match insanity.
• Alicia Fox looks good in a crown.

Dolph Ziggler def. Mark Henry in a Beat the Clock Challenge

• Crowd was into Mark Henry but went wild for Ziggler. For all the tough times he's endured, people are still really into him.
• A good match, since the two play to each other's strengths - Henry is best when he can ragdoll people around and Ziggler is best when he can take massive bumps and try and get by on agility.
• The real highlight here was of course the after match segment, where RVD comes out for no reason whatsoever only to be killed in the back of the head by Bad News Barrett, who got a colossal cheer. 
• The subsequent promo was even better as Barrett explained how the English CONTROL TIME ITSELF then called RVD 'a bloody Yank' to predictably massive audience approval.
• Being played off to Rule Britannia was the over-the-top cherry on the cake.

Adam Rose was interviewed by Renee Young before they were interrupted by Jack Swagger and Zeb Colter.

• I'm not the biggest fan of Adam Rose but I'll admit the gimmick is pretty infectious when you're there in person. The entire arena was bouncing along singing his theme song.
• Rose did well selling his campy, quirky character (which I suspect probably goes down a bit better over here than in the States).
• That bunny can move. Doing a kip-up in that costume is mighty impressive.
• Zeb Colter is the perfect party pooper. His mic work is so good it's extremely easy to boo him. First instace of the 'WHOAREYA?' chant popping up.
• After Swagger cheap-shotted Rose he got a fantastic 'YOU'RE A LEMON' chant.
• Crowd were looking for any excuse to sing the song. An encouraging sign for Rose, he was very over.

John Cena (w/The Usos) defeated Luke Harper (w/The Wyatt Family) after Bray Wyatt interefered

• The crowd sung JOHN CENA SUCKS to the tune of his theme song.
• Mobile phones were out and swaying was in full effect for the Wyatt's entrance.
• Cena and Harper have had better versions of this match before, but it was still good fun.
• For a man who's 6 foot 5 and 275lbs, Luke Harper moves with scary speed and grace. Seeing him hurricanrana Cena was breathtaking.
• Bray's snap Sister Abilgails on the Usos looked super cool and brutal as hell.
• Pretty rote ending, but having Bray singing on top of the ramp while Harper counted was a very cool visual to end the show.

Dark segments

• Bray returned to the ring and threw John Cena's shoe into the crowd. Crowd sung 'JOHN CENA'S SHOE' to the tune of his theme song.
• Bray then cut a quick promo about how awesome the Wyatt Family was and issued an open challenge. The Shield came out and there was a quick mini-brawl which ended with the Hounds of Justice standing tall. Erick Rowan was left flat on his back in the ring.
• After the Shield had left, Bad News Barrett came down to the ring, announced he had some bad news then gave Rowan the Bullhammer elbow.
• Cena recovered, cracked a quick joke or two then left the mic to Barrett. Barrett cut a (mostly out of character) promo about how good it was to be back in the UK. He put over his fellow British stars Paige and Adrian Neville.
• Stephanie McMahon came out to tell Barrett the show was over, the left and cut the lights and sound. They came back up and then were cut several more times as he tried to carry on talking.
• Triple H came out and once again re-iterated the show was over. He started heeling on the crowd in classic style, telling us we had bad teeth and bad hygiene in an appalling British accent.
• Adam Rose came out again to big cheers and danced his way to the ring. Triple H got the 'YOU'RE A LEMON' chant as weel as a good 'WHOAREYA?' chant.
• Eventually Triple H got in the ring and got a Bullhammer elbow in the face. Show closed with Adam Rose dancing in the ring as the crowd chanted along.

While overseas Raws are never huge shows because they're always 'middle of the road' shows, this was a lot of fun and I'm really glad I went along. 4 and a half hours is a lot of time to sit watching wrestling, but it was a great experience.

All photos (c) WWE except the last one, which is mine!